Surviving the Covid-19 Pandemic & the Lockdown Effect

by HD

 

Social distancing rules the world for now as the lockdown is in full effect throughout the globe. All non-essential travel and public gatherings have come to a halt amidst the fear of the Covid-19 pandemic. People can only leave home to shop for essential items, for attending medical care, or when their work cannot be done at home. Being top of each other in the house is a real challenge. We're stuck inside our homes, forced to spend more time together than ever before. We don't have to be confined to a small family dwelling, with no garden to escape to, to feel the strain of lockdown.

The strain of lockdown can exacerbate already difficult relationships as signs of family disharmony include negative low mood, emotional outbursts, resentment, and feelings of frustration. Here is how to cope with today’s difficult circumstances & how to adapt during the lockdown.

 

Handling kids during pandemic lockdown

Children can provide family life with wonderful moments. Their spontaneity and sense of fun can brighten the day. But almost out of the blue, squabbling, shouting or crying can break out and they can be a bit of a pain. They seem to be noisier, more untidy and more demanding than ever we expected. What they want can be different from what we want, testing our limits and boundaries.

Toleration and patience is called for and before over-reacting just relax & take few deep breaths. Also the ability to say 'no' firmly and consistently without undue fuss and guilt is important. Where to draw the line may need negotiating before hand with the children's other parent so they don't learn to play one parent off against the other. To accept authority, children need to be told firmly & authoritatively the reasons why they can't have what they want and above all they will need support and encouragement to explore new healthy hobbies.

Handling yourself during Lockdown

 

I suppose it is natural for you to feel irritated if a family member snaps at you. Not so much what they say but how they say it. They may raise their voice when this is uncalled for. And if there have been several angry outbursts lately, we probably would get cross ourselves, which of course makes things worse. Now both of you think how unfair the other is being. Resentment can fester for a while and add to disquiet. We can end up imagining getting our own back on each other.

Keep your mind engaged on a suitable indoor activity or a hobby; get to learn new skills and stuff, practice meditation. Now is the best time to engage & learn meditation, do light workout, read legendary & heroic tales & stories, or watch epic movies with morality & heroism, learn to be aware of your thoughts and control them. Above all never take any matter to extreme always practice with modesty and calmness. And take care of each other and your family members so as to support and please.

Being mindful of the lockdown

One needs to lower the tension somehow. Not raising it by trying to even the score. Not making things worse by getting our own back on someone. The challenge is to keep our head and to notice resentful thoughts and not to engage them. Part of you wants to blame someone when things are not right. But rather than act on this, we can learn to observe this inner rush to be judgmental. We can be more mindful of not only our own natural reactions, but those of others around us and to do this with an awareness of the bigger picture.

 

Tension of lockdown & assertion

The result might be to remain silent when someone is having a go at us. Perhaps wait for a more opportune moment when they are ready to listen. It is possible to resolve a disagreement later then to calmly assert our own viewpoint.

Those with assertion skills can put forward their point of view showing respect, neither interrupting nor speaking unnecessarily loudly. Without insisting one is right and the other person is wrong, however certain one might feel. This approach may involve being willing to negotiate some sort of compromise.

Collaboration with the person who has offended you might be a possibility. Each need to be willing to explore what had happened between them and to reflect on where things went wrong. How the tension could have been avoided. There might be an underlying issue that can be addressed. A solution to the problem might please both of you and them and go beyond what each of you had wanted in the first place.

Your partner's needs during Lockdown

 

Couples in lockdown will be thrown together for much of the time. A real test of love to survive this rough time of lockdown strain, the partners need to even better learn than they had previously, how to get on.

This includes being willing to consider and even prioritize each other's needs. Your partner may need to talk and be heard. May need practical help now in what they are doing or will need an equal share in decision making. And will need your forgiveness for any mistakes or wrong-doing.

Be forgiving during these harsh times

 

Usually it is easier to let bygones be bygones when the person who has done us wrong is genuinely sorry. But more difficult to 'forgive and forget' if they show less than complete remorse for what they have done. Likewise if only partly appreciating the hurt they have caused us.

 

To remove our resentment we could try recalling a time when we had done something bad ourselves to them. No one is perfect and if they were lenient with us then it makes it easier for us now.

Another tip is to consider what worldly or selfish desire in you that have been thwarted by the other person and reconsider its importance. Pride been wounded? Well what's so bad about a little humility? Time wasted by someone? Never mind there is plenty of time left in life to make up what was lost.

 

Hope for better future

The current pandemic is a big challenge for many people. But if we can better learn to live well under the constraint of the strain of lockdown then perhaps we will have a better quality of family life afterwards.